Twanglish Lesson: Stove

The “real” dictionary will tell you that a stove is a type of kitchen cooktop. Or it might reference the old Franklin potbelly, cast iron stoves that acted as cooktop, oven and heater for many a country house for generations. That’s not the kind of stove we’re defining today, though.

Stoveadjective 1. A condition of being stiff or sore in both joints and muscles:

Daddy was all stove up after that mule kicked him.

I’m sure you’ve been stove up before. (Heck, I’m stove up right now.) It might have come after a football game where you absorbed one too many punishing hits. Maybe you spent a good fourteen hours in the garden. Or maybe you finally got up off the sofa and hit the gym for the first time in years. However you got there, what you’re left with is the kind of all-over body aches that leave you nearly immobile.

All you can do for being stove up is have a cup of joe, take a few aspirin and keep going. Whatever you do, don’t whine about; Real Southern Men just grunt and go on.

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